


Saw XVII: The Spluttering

by dementor_ssc



Series: Transcendence AU drabbles [9]
Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Alternate Universe - Transcendence, Gen, Slice of Life, slasher movies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-06
Updated: 2016-09-06
Packaged: 2018-08-13 11:42:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,025
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7975564
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dementor_ssc/pseuds/dementor_ssc
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Years after the whole Blood Valley fiasco, Acacia Pines doesn't get scared by gory movies.</p>
<p>Just a little drabble here.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Saw XVII: The Spluttering

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by [this](http://transcendence-au.tumblr.com/post/150033767994/fic-prompt-the-pines-family-have-a-movie-night) prompt.
> 
> The [Blood Valley](http://transcendence-au.tumblr.com/post/101925199783/the-quest-for-blood-valley) story is a must-read (it's awesome!).

_Saw XVII: The Spluttering_ wasn’t a good movie. It relied too much on cheap jump scares and lots of gore, the plot basically boiled down to ‘crazy mastermind kills people in increasingly bloody and improbable ways’, and the characters were flat and boring enough you didn’t really care how gruesomely they died onscreen.

Still, she was having so much fun. She could remember very clearly how much she’d wanted to watch Blood Valley as a kid, and [how her uncle had tricked her](http://transcendence-au.tumblr.com/post/101925199783/the-quest-for-blood-valley). (No she never had nightmares about that stupid movie, sheesh, she was Acacia Pines, way too cool for nightmares.)

Her uncle seemed to think she was (still) scared of gory movies, because his smile had been teasing as he agreed with her that yes, she was old enough to watch Saw, “Come on Henry, she’s sixteen, she won’t faint because of a little blood!”

He was clearly expecting her to backtrack and admit she’d rather watch something else.

Joke’s on him this time, because Acacia didn’t have any problem watching the movie. It was messy and whew, the producers had really _splurged_ on the fake-intestine budget, but she wasn’t a little kid anymore.

Willow was out with Mum (paying bail for Grunkle Stan again), Hank was watching the movie while pretending to read, Dad was actually reading because he’d gotten bored with the lack of plot, and Uncle Dipper…

(Acacia felt her grin widen and really, this was _payback_ for that stunt he pulled when she was a kid, this was so funny)

… Uncle Dipper was hiding behind the couch.

The big, bad demon fled to the shadowy crack between the wall and the couch at the very first jump scare, and he hadn’t come back out. There had been some faint, almost whimpering sounds in the beginning, which had fallen silent by now.

The movie reached its climax, blood and greyish brain matter splattering across the screen.

Was Uncle Dipper even still there? His silence was getting suspicious. Maybe he’d left after the first half of the movie. She was going to tease him either way, of course. Running away was even worse than just hiding.

She glanced away from the screen and looked behind her, to check.

Only the top of Uncle Dipper’s head peeked out. It was void-black and his eyes, gold from edge-to-edge, were fixed unmovingly on the screen. She moved a bit, until she could see the rest of his face, mouth hanging open and drooling gold.

The demon drool had already eaten a trail through the back of the couch. Oh. That must have been that faint sizzling sound. She’d thought that had been part of the movie.

Dad put down his book.

He looked at them and sighed. “Yggdrasil again?”

“No!” Acacia protested - hey, this wasn’t her fault! Not this time anyway. “I didn’t do anything!”

(Most kids had only basic rules like ‘go to bed at ten,’ or ‘eat all your vegetables’. The Pines household had a few additional ones, like “Don’t drug your uncle. Seriously, don’t. I know it’s funny, but it’s still not very nice.”)

“Maybe it’s the movie?” Hank suggested.

The final explosion thundered from the speakers. On the screen, one lone motorcycle wheel rolled from the burning wreckage of the Murder Museum and detached limbs started raining down.

Uncle Dipper seemed mesmerised, his gaze wide and unseeing.

Acacia took the spoon from her empty icecream carton and gave her uncle’s forehead a good hard poke.

Uncle Dipper blinked. His eyes seemed to become less blown as the void dripped away from his skin.

He awkwardly wiped the golden spit from his face.

“… so,” he said. “Boy, that was a bad movie.”

“The worst,” Acacia said, spoon still in hand.

“No plot at all,” Hank agreed.

“It’s the seventeenth movie of the series,” Dad said. “Of course it’s bad. We could have watched _The Centaur Chronicles of Blarnia_ instead.”

“We can still watch it?” Hank shrugged. “Mom isn’t back yet.”

An odd multi-toned rumble came from Uncle Dipper’s stomach. His cheeks flushed as they looked at him.

“… excuse me,” he said. “I’m, uh… going to go. Somewhere.”

“We’re having burgers tonight,” Dad said. “I’m sure Mabel has set a few aside for you already, if you like you can have one now.”

“Burgers sound great, can I have mine too?“Acacia asked. She grinned. "With lots of ketchup.  Phew, Tori said watching splatter movies worked up an appetite, she wasn’t kidding. I could eat a horse right now!”

Her uncle glanced away, wearing his Angsty Face™. “Don’t joke about that, Pole Star.”

Ugh. And the worst bit was that she couldn’t tease him about those jump scares. (Those had _totally_ worked on him, she was going to remember that for later.) Not when he was all gloomy and serious like this.

She threw a Look at her brother. At least he got the hint.

“I could have a burger,” Hank said brightly. “Can we have them now, Dad? Who knows when Mom and Willow are getting back. They’re probably having dinner with Grunkle Stan.”

“Your mother does like prison food,” Dad sighed. “Says it adds ambience… Alright, I’ll start grilling them. You both set the table. And don’t forget the lettuce.”

“Lettuce forget,” Acacia intoned, bowing her head reverently.

Dad rolled his eyes at that old pun. “Oh, and Dipper? Could you repair the back of the couch, please? You can have your burger raw if you want.”

Uncle Dipper fidgeted a bit, then nodded. “Deal. Thanks Henry.”

He followed Dad to the kitchen, some of that angst already fading from his face.

Hank made a small noise as soon as they were gone.

“I don’t know if I can have a burger right now,” he admitted, a bit green at the thought. “My stomach is pretty much tied in knots after all that. You had to pick the most disgusting movie ever.”

“You’ll live,” Acacia said. “Come on, we’ve got to set the table and hide the lettuce.”

Blergh, lettuce. She wasn’t a _rabbit_.

He made a face. “Just so you know, next time _I’m_ picking the movie.”

“Yeah, yeah.”


End file.
